


where sleep will be peaceful; unharried by terror.

by gallantrejoinder



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: But I Luv Them, F/M, Gentle and soft things, Nightmares, Sharing a Bed, Sleep, This is literally so schmoopy, and cheesy, four times plus one
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-05
Updated: 2016-12-05
Packaged: 2018-09-06 17:11:23
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,532
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8761858
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/gallantrejoinder/pseuds/gallantrejoinder
Summary: Four times Allura and Shiro slept side by side and it didn't mean anything - plus the one time that it did.





	

1.

 

It begins one evening after a hard mission, the kind that leave them all exhausted and unable to function properly for the next couple of days. Allura knows that her paladins have fought the Galra with all their might and won, but that does not change the toll it takes on their fragile human bodies.

Even Shiro is particularly exhausted today, reflexively massaging the phantom pains of his lost arm away in the training room, where he sits against the wall. Allura examines him carefully for a few minutes before clearing her throat to make herself known, but he looks up with only a quiet half-smile, not even startling at being interrupted.

“The other paladins have taken to their beds,” Allura says, standing before him with her hands folded. “I told them to stretch out their muscles or be sore in the morning, but …”

“They’re impatient,” Shiro says, smiling.

“They are a very … brash group of paladins, I must admit. Not you, of course,” Allura concedes.

“Not me?” Shiro repeats, frowning in puzzlement.

The corners of Allura’s lips twitch upwards as she lowers herself to sit beside him, gathering in her skirts so they do not crinkle. “Well, you’re here, aren’t you?”

“True,” Shiro says thoughtfully. Allura chuckles.

He continues to stretch and pull at his shoulders, wincing and grimacing as he struggles to get at the correct spots, while Allura takes the time to stretch out her legs and arms before she too rests for the night. She watches him struggle for a few minutes before finally huffing and grabbing his hands.

“Here,” she says to his questioning expression. “This is a trick my father taught me. I don’t know if it work on a human, but there’s no harm in trying. Scooch up.”

Shiro obligingly moves forward, allowing her to settle in behind him on her knees, while he sits cross legged and hunched over. “This had better not be like Coran’s _trick_ involving Keith’s hair and a pair of scissors.”

Allura giggles. “No, nothing like that.”

She reaches up and begins to massage his shoulders, concentrating on discovering the source of his pain. She presses and prods, circling different spots for a few minutes, letting her fingers sense what needs to be soothed.

“You know, I’m pretty sure we have massages on Earth, princess,” Shiro teases, sounding a little flustered. Before he can say anything else, however, she jabs the knot she has found in his shoulder, hard. He yelps and goes to move away, but Allura holds him in place and shushes him, concentrating.

“Sit still, I promise this will help. Well it should, anyway,” Allura says.

“ _Should_?” Shiro says, sounding concerned.

Allura does not reply, simply pushing harder against the knot of muscle in Shiro’s particularly well-built shoulder. Just when she thinks Shiro is actually going to push her away, she taps into her lifeforce and projects a healing aura through her fingers and into Shiro’s shoulder. The effect is instantaneous: Shiro’s tense shoulders drop and his head whips around to look at her, surprised.

“How did you …?” He begins, unable to finish as he turns to face her.

Allura smiles smugly. “I told you.”

“You did,” Shiro says, in a strange tone of voice.

“Well,” Allura says, feeling oddly embarrassed all of a sudden. “I have to admit, that took some strength out of me. I think I will go bed now.” It’s true, taking energy out of herself like that often leaves her exhausted – though healing one tiny knot in Shiro’s shoulder is nowhere near as taxing as some of her other feats.

“Of course,” Shiro says. “I might just stay down here a bit longer, though.”

Allura raises her eyebrows. “Well, I’ll stay with you until you go, then.”

“Princess, you don’t have to –”

“What sort of leader would I be if I didn’t make sure all of my paladins were well rested and safe?” Allura interrupts. “Go on. I’ll just … wait here, against the wall.”

“If you say so,” Shiro says.

Allura settles herself comfortably against the wall with a firm nod and watches Shiro continue to push himself, even though she is beginning to suspect it is not truly necessary.

The next thing she knows, there is a warm weight at her side, learning on her heavily. She blinks her eyes open and realises she’s fallen asleep in the training room – and the weight at her side is Shiro, fast asleep with his head on her shoulder.

 _How_ ...?

No, there’s no point in asking. Shiro is clearly exhausted. Gently extracting herself from under his weight, Allura shifts herself into being a little taller for convenience’s sake. She picks him up, careful not to disturb his sleep, and carries him back to his room. When she lays him down on his bed, she has no excuse to stare at him for a moment longer than she should – except that the calm he radiates in his waking hours is gone now, replaced with lines in his forehead and tense hands.

Allura wonders whether the lonely hours deep in the night may not be hers alone, after all.

 

2.

 

The next time it happens, it is the middle of the night and Allura cannot sleep.

Since waking up into the universe without Altea, without her father, Allura has maintained a lazer-point focus on destroying the Galra empire. It fills her waking days and gives her purpose. Her paladins have proved themselves repeatedly, despite their youth and inexperience. She channels all her energy into making them better, into planning for the future.

But at night, she cannot put off the weight of her loss. And so she cannot sleep.

This particular night, she has had enough of the darkness of her room, the mice asleep and unbothered beside her. Slipping from her bed, she begins to wander the halls of the castle, though the quiet darkness is empty of the answers she seeks.

But then she comes across another midnight wanderer.

Shiro sits, gazing out the wide windows that face the stars, with an exhausted expression on his face. For a moment, Allura simply looks at him, really _looks_. She knows, of course, about his time with the Galra. They all do: his arm is mark of their cruelty and their devastating power. But she had not thought about what it must have done to his mind and heart until now.

She doesn’t say anything, simply walks towards him and lets her footsteps announce her presence. He turns and acknowledges her with a nod. She sits beside him, hugging her knees and observing – but not commenting upon – the fact that his human hand is shaking a little where it hangs over his lap.

“Can’t sleep?” she asks, to break the silence.

He shakes his head. “Nightmares,” he says tersely.

“Me too,” she admits, and he raises his eyebrows, quietly surprised. Allura huffs a little. “I lost my planet, Shiro. My father. I can’t …”

“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to – You always seem to have it together, princess. I didn’t think,” he says, looking apologetic.

“No, it’s all right. I didn’t either. I didn’t know you’ve been having trouble sleeping.”

“Well, I didn’t mean for anyone to know. When I was a kid, I would always crawl into my parents’ bed when I had bad dreams. I always slept better with someone else beside me.”

“You should have told us, Shiro. Your paladins should be like your family. I know you consider yourself their leader, but you cannot isolate yourself from them,” Allura says reproachfully.

“Oh, but _you_ can?” Shiro says, giving her a _gotcha_ expression.

Allura presses her lips together. “Yes, well … touché.”

Shiro cracks a quiet smile for that. Silence falls for a few moments more before he speaks. “So. Pidge seems to be on the verge of hacking into the Glara mainframe, or so they tell me.”

“… _Mainframe_? What makes Pidge think that the Glara would have a singular mainframe to contain all their information? I mean, that’s just …”

They continue talking for the rest of the night, discussing the progress of the other paladins and even, on occasion, making each other laugh. Allura finds herself stretching back to lie on the hard floor, Shiro following shortly afterwards. And in the morning, she wakes to find him carrying her back to her room – but she says nothing and lets sleep take her as soon as he lays her gently down in her bed. He leaves as quietly as she found him, sitting still and staring at the stars.

 

3.

 

The third time it happens, Allura is walking along the castle hallways again, getting lost in the blackness of the night. The mice have followed her tonight, scurrying behind her and occasionally stopping if they spot some interesting speck of dirt. Their company is appreciated, but Allura cannot help but hope, quietly, that she might run into Shiro again, just to talk …

As it turns out, Shiro has not left his room tonight. He hasn’t even woken up - and Allura knows this because she can hear him screaming in his sleep. She begins to run – practically breaking into a sprint – towards his room.

As she frantically skids around the corner and into his room, she can see him twitching and shaking in his bed, eyes screwed shut in a tense expression of dread. He’s kicked off most of the sheets and is sweating through what remains. His mouth hangs open, slack, as he pants and whimpers with fear. She approaches slowly, forcing herself not to reach for him – alarmed, his Galra-engineered arm might attack before he could think to stop it.

She forces herself to stop a few feet away from the bed before she begins to talk, in as clear and calm a voice as she can manage.

“Shiro. You’re safe here. You’re aboard the castle, with me, and the paladins and Coran. You’re safe, Shiro. I’m here.”

She continues to speak variations of the same for the next few minutes, adopting a soothing tone, monotonous but clear. As she speaks, he begins to wake up, slowly, calming down all the while. His breathing evens out and finally, he opens his eyes.

“Allura?” His whisper reveals a voice that can only be described as _wrecked_.

“Yes, Shiro, I’m here,” she whispers back, fighting to keep unexpected tears from her eyes. She blinks them back and slowly moves forward to sit on the edge of the bed, by his legs, to give him room.

He sits up, and raises his hands to cover his eyes. His human hand is shaking again.

“Do you – when I was a little girl, after I had a nightmare, father would always ask if I wanted to talk about it,” Allura says.

“No,” Shiro says hoarsely. “No, I can’t – I can never remember them.”

“Oh,” Allura says eloquently.

“I’m sorry,” he replies quietly.

Allura cannot stand the guilty look on his face. He’s done nothing to deserve the feeling.

Perhaps it’s her own guilt that motivates her to make the forward suggestion she makes next.

“Shiro … You know, I could always stay.”

He blinks blearily, confused. “Stay?”

“With you. I mean, I could sleep beside you.”

Shiro suddenly looks very awake and very alarmed, so Allura presses on quickly to explain. “I remember – the last time you couldn’t sleep, you said you slept better with someone else nearby. I just thought …”

“No!” Shiro interrupts, a little loudly. “No, I don’t mind. That – uh, that sounds nice. I mean, if you don’t want to go back to your bed.”

“Well, not tonight, no. Though perhaps in future we could use my bed? It is bigger, after all.”

“Your bed?” Shiro says, in a strangled voice.

“Well, yes. If I’m to sleep beside you I think it would be best. But not tonight, as I said. We’re already here,” Allura says, falling into the sensible and pragmatic mode she adopts as leader of the paladins easily.

“That …” Shiro begins, before swallowing. He looks thoughtful for a moment. “That sounds fine by me.”

“Then it’s settled,” Allura says, smiling to see him so clearly distracted from his nightmares. “Move up.”

“Always so bossy, princess,” Shiro responds, but he makes room for her.

She lies down beside him, settling in and listening to the mice finding places to sleep around the room. Shiro lies stiffly at first but relaxes soon enough into sleep, and Allura follows soon after.

It isn’t until she’s just on the verge of unconsciousness that she remembers him calling her _Allura_ instead of princess, his voice rough with sleep, when he had first seen her standing beside him.

 

4.

 

They’ve gotten into the habit of sleeping in her room on quiet days, and his room when their missions leave them tired and sore. His is closer to the training room, and hers is a luxury that only leaves them both feeling wrong-footed and misshapen when they try to sleep there after fighting.

Allura knows a lot about how Shiro sleeps now. He mutters and murmurs most nights, fighting off terrible dreams. But he rarely escalates into screaming when she sleeps beside him. When he does, she sits up and moves out of the bed, and talks him down just like the first time. He always tries, feebly, to make her stop sharing the bed when that happens, when he finally wakes up to see her standing patiently by the bed. Allura never lets him push her away, though.

Shiro always seems to curl in on himself in his sleep, like the Altean insects Allura once played with as a child. He never draws nearer her in sleep than he starts out while awake. Never touches her, even when he begins to thrash in the throes of a nightmare.

Which is why Allura freezes up completely one morning when she wakes up to find his arm around her waist.

Maybe it’s because yesterday was a bad day, a hard battle that they’d only gotten away with by the skin of their teeth. Maybe it’s because they’re in his smaller bed, or because they’ve simply gotten used to sleeping side by side.

But, truth be told, Allura suspects it’s mostly her fault. At some point in her sleep she must have plastered herself over him, head resting on his chest and an arm and a leg wrapped around the rest of him. Shiro isn’t doing anything more than lying there, dozing in the dimly lit room with his arm around her and – oh, his hand is _very_ warm on her hip. And speaking of hips, she can definitely feel something under her leg that is – very much _not_ his hipbone.

Allura swallows.

She doesn’t have much time to think about how to proceed, however, because Shiro suddenly tenses, and she can tell immediately that he’s awake.

Neither of them speak for a moment.

Allura scrambles back, practically leaping out of the bed. She opens her mouth to speak at the same moment as Shiro begins to speak.

“I’m so sorry, I never meant –”

“Oh god, I hope I didn’t make you uncomfortable –”

“– and I certainly wasn’t trying to –”

“– because I’ve always respected you, I know that you’re a princess and –”

“– I’m so sorry, Shiro, I’ll just – go now.”

Allura leaves his room, heart pounding. The last sight she sees before the door closes behind her is his flushed face and messy hair, eyes wide as he looks back at her with a terrifying kind of vulnerability.

 

5.

 

The following night, Allura waits in her room for Shiro to come to bed. But he doesn’t.

She paces in her room, furious with herself for ruining what was supposed to be a calming ritual for Shiro with her silly crush on him. And she can admit that that is what _it_ is now, that is why her stomach flutters when he smiles that ridiculously charming smile, that is what _it_ is that makes her face warm when she remembers how it had felt to hold him, and be held in return.

She stops suddenly and groans, dragging her hands over her face. The mice squeak and run about her feet, concerned for her. She sighs and stares at the door. Shiro is not coming.

Oh well. Another night of wandering about the castle, then.

She walks slowly tonight, considering how to approach Shiro and ask for his forgiveness. They had avoided each other all day, until even Lance had noticed that something was up. Allura can’t allow her feelings to get in the way of a functioning paladin team, so it’s up to her to beg for Shiro’s forgiveness.

She isn’t expecting to find him quite so soon, however.

He’s sitting and watching the stars again, like he did several weeks ago. The expression on his face tonight is not blank, though, it is … sad. A little wistful, even. She’s about to turn and leave him be, certain that she is not wanted, when he turns his head towards her, having already heard her approach. Nevertheless, there’s surprise evident on his face when he realises it is her, and not some other midnight wanderer.

“Princess,” he says, stilted. Allura hates it.

She walks forward and sits down beside him, flushed already from what she will have to say.

“Shiro,” she says, licking her lips, and staring at her knees. “I think I ought to apologise.”

“Apologise?” Shiro says, sounding confused.

“Yes, apologise. I should never have – crossed your boundaries like that. I didn’t mean to, of course, I was asleep. But I see now that I should have been more respectful, and left well enough alone. I’m so sorry, Shiro,” she says, feeling her cheeks grow ever warmer with shame.

“You never crossed any boundaries,” Shiro says, sounding more bewildered than ever.

“No, I did,” Allura says firmly. “Because I should never have offered to sleep beside you – I would never have offered, if I’d realised the extent of my feelings for you.”

Shiro’s voice, when it finally comes, cracks in the middle. “Your … feelings?”

Allura gives in to the urge to cover her face with her hands. “Oh, please don’t make me say it again. Yes, I have … feelings. For you. And I should never have continued to sleep in the same bed as you when I began to realise that,” she says, muffled through her hands.

He’s silent for a moment, and she jumps when she feels his hands come up to her face, over her own.

“Allura,” he says softly. “Please look at me.”

She lowers her hands. His follow, never letting go. The look on his face is utterly unreadable.

“I thought – I thought you were angry with me. Because of, um. Some – bodily reactions that I couldn’t really control,” he says, looking incredibly embarrassed.

It takes Allura a moment to remember, but then the realisation hits her. “… Oh. _Ohh_ ,” she says quietly.

Shiro chuckles uncomfortably. “Uh, yes. I thought you were angry with me because of … that.”

“I’m not,” Allura says, a little quickly.

“I hope you won’t be if I do this, then,” Shiro whispers.

And then he is leaning in, slowly enough that she can back away. His hands are warm around hers and her eyes are fluttering shut, and then he is kissing her, a gentle press of lips against her own that lasts only a few ticks.

When she opens her eyes, he is staring at her with an intense, yet gentle look in his eyes. An indescribable tenderness that sets her heart to beating faster. There is nervousness there too, though, and it prompts her to answer.

“I’m not angry,” she whispers.

A smile dawns on his face. “Well. That’s a relief,” he says in a hushed tone. “I don’t think I would have recovered from the shame if you hadn’t wanted it.”

“I do, Shiro. Do it again,” Allura says, feeling daring.

His expression becomes even more intense, something desperate in his eyes, but it lasts barely a moment before he is leaning forward and kissing her once more. And this time she does not allow him to pull back too soon, but reaches a hand up into his hair and tugs him closer. She can feel the small sound he makes in the back of his throat as he opens his mouth for her, as she runs her tongue along his bottom lip and bites down gently before pulling away once more.

She leans her forehead against his to catch her breath, and feels him doing the same, squeezing the hand that remains in her lap.

“Allura,” he whispers, reverently. She has never felt more full than she does right now, not since long before she woke up into this strange new universe.

“Shiro,” she replies, murmuring. “Let’s go to bed.”

That night, they both sleep more peacefully than they can remember sleeping in some time. Not since the lions chose their paladins, since Allura woke up alone, since Shiro lost months alone in the hands of the Galra. They do not dream, but when they wake, they find themselves in each other’s arms once more, and do not pull away.

**Author's Note:**

> Fun fact: the title is from one of my own poems, because I'm that pretentious. I wrote this on a whim after finally getting around to finishing the series today. I fucking love these two. They got me good.
> 
> The poem, for those interested, is this:
> 
> soon enough these heavy stones  
> that weigh down the air around you  
> that drag in shadows to devour the light,  
> will crumble.  
> soon enough the clouds will rise  
> and pour forth their watery burden,  
> and settle in the earth, and call up flowers,  
> to greet the sun.  
> days are coming yet for you  
> where there will be no tears but those born of love,  
> where sleep will be peaceful, unharried by terror,  
> and all the world’s open sky will be yours.  
> until then, love, hold on to me,  
> for our happiness comes,  
> soon enough.
> 
> [My Tumblr.](https://gallantrejoinder.tumblr.com/)


End file.
